20 of the funniest and most ironic last words from history
Throughout history, a dying person’s final words have been meticulously written down and recorded. These last words are often thoughtful, wise, and tear-inducing. Well today, we won’t be looking at that kind. Today we will be looking at last words that cause a chuckle, and maybe get us to think. The last words below are from some of history’s famous people including Voltaire, FDR, and Karl Marx. I hope you enjoy: 20 of the funniest and most ironic last words from history
*Warning* Some of these quotes contain foul language and profanities. People on their deathbed don’t care about polite language
General John Sedgwick. A man who’s last words proved ironic
“Oh god, I’ve been murdered”: Spencer Perceval. Perceval supposedly uttered these words after being shot by John Bellingham at the House of Commons
“This is no time to be making new enemies”: Voltaire. Voltaire quipped this after a priest asked him to renounce Satan
“I’m bored with it all”: Winston Churchill. Churchill said this before suffering a fatal stroke
“I didn’t do that on purpose”: Marie Antoinette. Marie Antoinette stepped on the foot of her executioner and quickly apologized. These would be her last words before being beheaded during the French Revolution
“I must go for the fog is rising”: Emily Dickinson The famous American poet said this before dying of heart failure
“They couldn’t hit an elephant at this distance”: General John Sedgwick. In a very ironic situation, these were Segdewick’s last words before being shot under the eye by a Confederate sniper
“I do not believe in my death”: Salvador Dali. The eccentric artist reportedly didn’t believe in his mortality before suffering cardiac arrest
“I’m going to the bathroom to read”: Elvis Presley. Elvis said this to his girlfriend Ginger Alden before suffering a drug-induced heart attack on the toilet
“I am about to or I am going to either expression is correct”: Dominique Bouhors French Grammarian. Even when his hour of death was at hand, this French Grammarian remained devoted to the art of proper grammar
“How’s this for your headline, French Fries!” James Donald French. French a convicted murdered said this moment before facing his end at the electric chair
“One last drink please”: Jack Daniels. The namesake of the famous brand of whiskey said this before succumbing to a blood infection caused by kicking a safe
“Die, why that’s the last thing I’ll do”: Groucho Marx.The American humorist quipped this before dying of pneumonia
“Thomas Jefferson survives”: John Adams. Adams and Jefferson were once great rivals who later became friends. Interestingly, Jefferson died a few hours earlier but both men died on July 4th 1826
“What do you think I am going to do blow my brains out?” Terry Kath. The lead singer of the band Chicago uttered this eerie prediction while holding what he thought was an unloaded gun. Tragically, the gun was loaded and Kath fulfilled his own prophecy
“I desire to go to Hell and not Heaven In the former place I shall enjoy the company of popes, kings, and princes, while in the latter are only beggars, monks, and apostles”: Niccolo Machiavelli. The infamous Italian politician and diplomat offered this unusual opinion before dying of natural causes
“Fuck, a bullet wound!”:Antonio Jose De Sucre Venezuelan independence leader and President of Peru and Bolivia. De Sucre uttered this blunt expression in the middle of his assassination.
“Go on, get out! Last words are for fools who haven't said enough”: Karl Marx. The famed author of the Communist Manifesto didn’t believe much in the last words
“God Damn you”: George V. The early twentieth-century English monarch yelled this at his nurse who gave him a sedative
“I have a terrific Headache”: FDR. One of America’s most influential presidents said this in the middle of suffering a brain hemorrhage that would prove fatal.
“I wonder why he shot me” Huey Long. The Great Depression-era reformist and demagogue figure said this after being shot at the Louisiana State capital building, where he would later die.
